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N Apostrophe T

N Apostrophe T

Tom Lehrer

2:1337

N Apostrophe T Lyrics

(Scene: Outside the cave of a very grouchy hermit (H). A very sweet child (C) coming along) (C): Isn′t it a lovely day? (H): No, it isn't! (C): Could you come outside and play? (H): No, I couldn′t! (C): Did you ever take a hike? (H): No, I didn't! (C): How'd you like to ride my bike? (H): Frankly, I wouldn′t! (C): Isn′t, couldn't, didn′t, wouldn't. Is that all you can say? (H): Isn′t, couldn't, didn′t, wouldn't - Yes, now go away. The sweetest sound to me. It stands for "not", I like it a lot. It's spelled "n"-apostrophe-"t". (C): Have you ever tried to smile? (H): No, I haven′t! (C): Won′t you try it for a while? (H): No, I won't! (C): Are there games to play in there? (H): No, there aren′t! (C): Then why d'you like to stay in there? (H): Frankly, I don′t! (C): Haven't, won′t, aren't, don't. Is that all you can say? (H): Haven′t, won′t, aren't, don′t - And I said, "Go away." Grouches all agree. We get a glow From saying "no" With "n"-apostrophe-"t". (C): Do you talk to anyone? (H): (wistfully) No, I don't! (C): Come on out and have some fun. (H): (hesitantly) No, I couldn′t! (C): Can't you even tell me why? (H): (apologetically) No, I can′t! (C): Will it kill you just to try? (H): (wanting to) Well, I shouldn't... (C): Don't, couldn′t, can′t, shouldn't. Now, try it once my way. (C): Do? (H): Do... (C): Could? (H): Could... (C): Can? (H): Can... (C): Should. (H): Should! Hey, that feels okay! (C): So come along with me... (H): I′ll give it a try. And say goodbye To "n"-apostrophe, (C): "N"-apostrophe, (C, H):"N"-apostrophe-"t"!